Since this term began, Bradley has been coming home with a lot of detentions. Now this shouldn't be happening since he is on Ritalin and should be concentrating like a pro.
The first detention for 14th Oct. was for talking in line. Then he got a detention for not taking his PE kit. Now I know that he did take his PE kit because I made him pack it but they wanted his swimming kit. I wrote on the slip that he had his PE clothes and I didn't want him swimming anyway because he had a cold.
14th October - Detention for talking in line. On the 14th I checked if he went and he said yes.
16th October - Detention for no PE kit. I wrote a letter on the slip. Brad didn't hand it in!
21st and 22nd October - Detention x 2 for not attending detention on the 14th.
26th and 29th October - Detention for not attending the detention on the 16th October (that I wrote the note for) and detention for not having pe kit again. This time I wrote on the slip in big letters - No Costume, no money!
30th Oct. and 2nd Nov - Detention for missing break detentions.
Oh yes! In addition to having 1 hour detention in the afternoon, he now has indefinite break (both breaks) detentions for not completing his daily writing homework and for handing in sloppy work. There are also pretty red writing notes in his homework notebook that he keeps ditching the break detentions and running off to the playground to play.
Oh my gosh and you wonder why I hate the schools. There are only about 30 days left to the year. Can you please leave my child alone so that he can try and pass the year!
I just screamed and screamed this morning. I hate doing that and Bradley hates it. I just wish it would all go away.
I think I had 2 detentions in my whole school career. This is why Bradley is as closed as a clam when it comes to school. I have walked through the school and listened to the teachers yell the ugliest things at the children. Its like a war zone. We were treated and likewise treated our teachers with a lot more respect than is flowing around out there now.
On the way to school, Bradley finally piped up (he had been sullenly silent up until then) and pulled his Bio test result out of his bag. "See mom, I'm not concentrating on all that now. This is what I'm concentrating on at the moment". And it was rather a good result too.
I know the teachers have to keep discipline but really, you know my son battles at school. Can't you just f**king back off and give him space to breathe!
Momcat you are very right to feel this way. I used to watch teachers pick on certain kids in school and think "you bloody b*tches using kids for your own personal anger outlet!!!"
ReplyDeleteDetention is not a viable soultion long term anyway.
I also cant stand this nonsense about no talking in line. Well then hurry the heck up and get your boring assembly over with so the kids can go and learn!!!
Perhaps a meeting with this teacher in the presence of the principle just to get through the rest of the year?
Send us her cell number and we will phone her at night and say "stop talking in line lady" and then breathe deeply... ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!
Forever - It is really frustrating. Bradley has ADD and is also learning to manipulate situations unfortunately. He just doesn't see the sense in investing energy in something that is not going to get him marks. These kids have an alternative way of thinking which doesn't go down well with the teachers. He is getting detention for such stupid things though and because I cant shout at the teachers, I shout at him.
ReplyDeleteI attended a meeting last week where it was discussed that the new generation on the verge of entering the work place is now very different to the previous generation. We had Baby Boomers, generation X etc etc and apparently this new generation is just totally different. They refuse to sweat the small stuff and waste time on things they perceive to be useless to their goal and this has the potential to drive teachers and employers nuts!
ReplyDeleteThey work smart and not hard at all costs as well and I suspect your Brad is a great example of this despite and above his ADD.
I'll see if I can find out the books name just for your interest.
In the menatime... vasbyt! Get him through as much schooling as you can and he may just flourish when he gets into the real world where rules are different to those at school.
How about a good old glass of wine tonight?
I really am trying and because I cant change the system I try to influence Brad. ADD or right-brained thinkers see the bigger picture. They don't sweat the small stuff. They dont consider it important. The Outcomes Bases Education system is totally useless for these learners as it forces a level of work production which is unreachable for them. He will flourish out in the real world but like my older son, may not even get a chance because everyone wants a matric level education no matter how lowly the position. Unless the 'real world' recognises these learners they will be misunderstood and left behind by all but their hardpressed mothers. I could do with a Savannah right about now!
ReplyDeleteMy mom also battled with my brother in school. He is by no means mentally challenged BUT he hated theory and reading and all the rules of school. He is now doing so well but he did manage to scrape through Matric which as you say.. people seem intent on wanting matric qualification.
ReplyDeleteThis world and its processes are so frustrating.
They should have stream line schooling from grade 8 on. Those who want to do theoretical degrees etc go to a type of school. Those who want to follow anything arty go to another school and those who are technical go to yet another school.
The teachers would have to fit in with the students instead of the other way around!!!
You deserve a 6 pack of Savannah!
Or a bottle of vodka!! T came to the car almost in tears saying he HATES school and he is NEVER going back. He doesn't have ADD but he is into art and wildlife and animals and nature. He is very clued up on the things that interest him but cannot be bothered with the things that don't, he also gets dum detentions and punishments and I can fully understand your frustration. I have written some hectic letters to teachers in my life, good luck!
ReplyDeleteMy youngest son is a borderline genius but he hated school with a passion. We took him out and he finished with home studies and works for the forestry where he can be outdoors and he's doing fine. (He's 19 now) I have another son that was the opposite, he loved school, graduated from UCLA, then got a master's from USC, and now he's a microbiologist with a terrific career. They all have their own paths. I hate it when teachers all gang up on a kid. Don't let them break Bradley's spirit. I am pulling for the two of you.
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean about the teachers. At our school, there are several that scream at the kids so loudly that you can hear them all the way down the hall. I pity the teacher that is brave enough to talk to mine like that!
ReplyDeleteOooh I am infuriated for you and Bradley!
ReplyDeleteIts exactly this sort of shit from schools that makes me want to go to war with them! Detention and break "deprivation" is so not the way to deal with an ADHDer at schools- ever- and teachers are clearly not paying attention.
You seriously need to throw your toys out of the cot with them!
If I could I'd go with you!
It sounds like his teacher is detention happy. I think the teacher should be sent to detention until the teacher can come up with a more creative way to deal with normal kid behavior.
ReplyDeleteThank you everyone for your support. Sometimes I really feel that banging my head against a brick wall would yield better results. I did end up phoning Brad's teacher eventually and apparently he is doing 2 break detentions in lieu of every 1 afterschool detention as I dont want him to stay late. I think he still has 10 to do! He must do his part though because when he hits high school there will be much more to remember and complete and I cant do it for him. I have made an arrangement with the teacher that I formulate a sheet where assignments can be written on and signed off by myself and the teacher when they are handed in completed. I must sit and work on that today.
ReplyDeleteDetentions for talking in line? Are you serious? How absolutely ridiculous. You have every right to be upset. Crazy.
ReplyDelete"Detentions for talking in line? Are you serious?"
ReplyDeleteYeah, probably.
I've taught for more years than most of you are old.
I LOVE the kids.
BUT, YOU try having a room of 20 twelve year olds. If you don't have a few 'stupid' rules, you can have chaos in a matter of seconds! We have to teach some students that read at 1st grade levels and college levels, do no math to Calculus, have ADD, ADHD and scads of other learning disabilities AND behavior issues. I KNOW....it is very difficult.
Sometimes, to the outsider, a rule like no talking in line sounds ridiculous, but it all depends on why that is the rule. Kids might have to be able to LISTEN to instructions, if needed, while in line. They might be in a place where if it gets too loud, it will disturb another learning situation. Who knows? There are many reasons for these 'rules'. I've learned over the years NOT to have too many rules at all, JUST the ones needed to run a safe and effective educational situation. Now, I'm not saying that maybe that rule isn't useless, and many times 'organized' chaos is wonderful, but sometimes it's not.
In our school parents are welcome to set up an appointment with the team of teachers, or one of them, to discuss what is going on. No one knows the kids better than their parents, but sometimes the parents are astounded by how the kid behaves in class.... Sometimes the kids are much BETTER in school, sometimes they act out, much to the surprise of parents. Sometimes the kids take advantage of the fact that there are NOT rules to be quiet in line.
It's all a very tricky situation that we struggle with every single day and I KNOW that most teachers work their butts off to be fair and accommodating to each and every student, even if it doesn't seem like it to a casual observer.
Make a plan WITH the teacher on how to get your son to do his best, scholastically and behaviorally. Teachers love knowing the parents support their kids.
KAT shouldn't say absolutely ridiculous (well, actually she can say anything she wants to..), but readers of your blog, including me, don't know the entire picture.
What I'm trying to say is that communication with kid and teacher needs to happen, and it sounds like you did that.
I know it's frustrating, I have an ADD child on meds, and I've had my share of concerns with teachers.
We all have to do the best that we can.